Thunderstorms Across the Valley

So our meals have improved a bit since the last journal. This week we had a spiced breakfast for dinner, eggs, pumpkin muffins and Kraft's "Pear Spice" recipe (pear with crushed vanilla wafer and cinnamon cool whip). We got creative as I have had the pumpkin bread mix in my cupboards since Christmas. The first month after having Riley Grace I took a bit of a break from cooking; now we are getting back around to everything I had once considered baking. Which reminds me that I still have peanutbutter balls in the freezer from Christmas! Wonder how long those will be good; guess I need to buy some chocolate chips to melt after our next trip to Walmart.

I'm currently watching one of our many summer storms clear through our eastern Kentucky valley. The view from our humble rental is absolutely stunning. We are set in a lush valley surrounded by green mountains. Not as large as the mountains in the heart of Asheville, but just as majestic as I watch lightening strike across the dark sky and listen to rain pellets pound on our roof. How mighty is our God.

I was wishing tonight that we had a covered porch like the one from our childhood parsonage in North Carolina (Dongell parsonage). I remember watching the thunderstorms from a safe, dry place, while cuddled in my parents' arms. And only because we are living in the south, do I also feel the need for an ice cold sweet tea from my Nana. Sorry Mama B, I did say sweet tea! My husband and his Texas family think that unsweetened tea is better but I am afraid I will always beg to differ that the south has learned best how to make tea. The secret, tons of sugar boiled in with the tea bags and water.

And just as quick as it came, the thunderstorm in our valley has passed. I had forgotten how much they used to scare me and how quickly they come and go. Ironic, I suppose this is much like storms in life.

May Madness

Our Spring Sweetie

Two Peas in a Pod

Trip to Asheville for Yard Maintenance

After all our hard work, signs of a yard are visible.  What once was a patch of woods is now close to manicured.  We will be sad to not live here but glad to see what is in store next.

Cow Hearts for Dinner?

As we have not sold our house and I have not been working the past few months, we have been trying to budget a little better.  The most obvious area of our budget, meals.  I will say it helps mothers who have limited creativity for dreaming up daily dinner concoctions.  I make about two or three meals a week and we eat leftovers the remainder of the week, until Sunday comes.  Our first stop after church are the ever so common letters W-A-L-M-A-R-T.  Probably not the best time to shop as we are starved by the time we finish visiting with families at our church, and are craving just about everything we walk by on Walmart aisles.

So in effort to control how much we buy, while shopping at such a poorly planned time, we generally have our ever constant list.  However, a few weeks ago, we decided to add a little variety and grill out all our meals.  We got chicken legs as John Tesh recommends, hot dogs, and Walmarts great value hamburgers.  The hamburgers were a great steal and would last over a number of weeks, or so we thought.  While Brenton was getting the grill ready, I was getting the meat out and decided to read what the burgers were made of.  The two main ingredients, beef and beef heart.  All of a sudden the idea of burgers made me want to throw up.

Trying to be "tough", I ate the burgers last week without telling Brenton to avoid spoiling his meals as well.  Well tonight, Brenton decided the burgers were such a steal that we should keep buying them.  At this point, I told Brenton what we were about to eat for dinner cause I had been choking down every burger we had up to til now.  We laughed about it through dinner, after dinner and through our walk, until Brenton became so sick he finally agreed that we could throw the rest out. 

Yes!  No more beef heart burgers!  The funny part of the whole ordeal is that we really didn't save anything by our new steal.  We actually spent the rest of the night drinking all our juice, soda and eating anything to wash out beef heart.

Good Night Moon

Sleep tight little munchkin.

A New Legacy: Faith

Riley Grace, our precious daughter, is teaching me many things, though two are engraved on my heart more deeply each day... the love of the Father and faith. Every morning I hold my baby girl and feel that I am going to burst at the seems, as my love overflows. I do not just love her; I love, love, love her. I now understand why the Lord asked Peter three times, "Do you love me?"

"Yes Lord, I love you."

"Do you love me?"

"Yes Lord, I love you."

"Do you love me?"

"Yes Lord, I love you."

How inadequate are these words. The meaning and the inner groaning of them reaches so much deeper. Just as I was reading this morning, "Oh, the depth of the riches and wisdom and knowledge of God!" (Rm. 11:33a)  When read, "Oh," to me, is an inner groaning of the true depths of His wisdom and knowledge. How much greater and stronger is the love of our Daddy, Abba Father, who has called us to be His children.

Brenton and I purchased a home, just about two years ago. We prayed it through and truly believed God opened door after door to make it possible. We were overjoyed with our dream home, a reality come true. Ironically, that home has now become the burden of my day, as we need it sold.  Then come the questions... "Where we wise in buying?", "Did God answer our prayers like He gave Isreal King Saul, who wanted a king though it was not best for them?", "Was this all to teach us a few lessons?" One thing I know, we cannot live in the past though my tendency shoots me right back there.

As time has passed and this burden has grown, we have begun to feel a little overwhelmed; and the more desperate we feel to have answers and make decisions. Speaking for myself, I know I initially tried to solve the burden on my own. However, being at home with my precious girl, I've been rendered helpless. Oh how I love, love, love being with her but how am I to help us? Christ reminded me, "Never be wise in your own sight." (Rm 12:16b) And then like clockwork, in my brokenness He became strong.

In a Sunday morning service a few weeks back, He probed me to come back to Him and sit at His feet, as He has honestly been on my backburner for sometime. First we, He and I, needed to deal with what was most important. I began reading in Acts where I had left off; reading about the apostles boldly sharing Christ, being persecuted and God's power being made known. Mixed with days of shedding tears, my faith slowly started to grow as I was reminded of the all-powerful God we serve. Our house, though major to us, is such a small feat to God, "The One who gives life to the dead and calls into existence the things that do not exist." (Rm 4:17)

Continuing through Romans, the Lord challenged me to have faith like Abraham, a faith "counted to him as righteousness." Abraham claimed the promise that God would give him a son, and he held fast to this promise. Romans 4:20-21 says, "No distrust made him waver concerning the promise of God, but he grew strong in his faith as he gave glory to God, fully convinced that God was able to do what he had promised." God has continued to bring many reminders of His truth to help me grow stronger.

I do not want to take scripture out of context and claim words that are not promises to all, but I do recall two promises Christ makes all believers. He will meet all our needs and He works all things together for our good, according to His will. The answer may not come as I hope, but I am not going to settle to believe what is easy. Until He answers this prayer, I am going to pray that He works in a mighty way because He is a Might God. In Romans 5:8, He says, "and hope does not put us to shame..." What is hope unless we believe God can do something greater than we can do ourselves?

"Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words." (Rm 8:26)  No, our house is not sold and I am no where near having faith like Abraham. But what I can say is that God is growing my faith daily and reminding me how dearly He loves me. Oh, He is breaking me, but somehow in this brokenness it all makes sense. And I am beckoned to remember, "Hope does not put us to shame."

Four Month's at a Glance (Riley)

What Soothes Me Most (in order from greatest to least):
1) Eating
2) Attention
3) Being Held
4) My Thumb
5) The movie, "Bug's Life"

Interesting Fact:
I threw up warm milk down mom's shirt on our walk today, Daddy and I thought it was very funny!  Then I pooed and messed through my outfit, on my blankey and on the floor... which got me a bath, my very favorite.

Who Are My Playmates:
Lexi (our family doggie), Lambie & Elephant (my blankie animals), "Oh, and the Sunday nursery workers love me too."

Most Recent Things I've Learned:
How to grab my feet and almost roll onto my tummy

What I Love (in order from greatest to least):
1) Attention
2) My Thumb
3) Playing
4) Water

Since Birth...
I usually wake up with a sniffly nose, have grown 5 1/2 inches (now at 26 1/2 in), and have gained about 7 lbs (almost to 16 lbs)

What the Doc Says:
I am very tall, and in the 97th percentile for my weight and height. And that I am very social and happy.


"And, yes, Mom and Dad are smitten with me."

"Heaven is For Real"

"And Lord, haste the day when my faith shall be sight,

The clouds be rolled back as a scroll;

The trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend,

Even so, it is well with my soul."

For the first time ever, I sang these lyrics with true fervor and excitement, all as a result of a little boy's testimony.  Ever since I was a little girl, I have feared "end times" or any discussion on the Lord's return.  I struggled with this internal battle of being afraid and feeling guilty that I did not long for the Lord's return. My husband had to jokingly put me on probation from these discussions at times.  I confess I still struggle with fear and worry, though a little boy's conviction and trust shook my faith in a radical way.

Please understand that I am a skeptic in many ways. I hear stories of others being healed, having dreams and visions, speaking in tongues; believing that the Lord is very capable of doing such things, just to turn around and critically judge every story I hear.  I purchased "90 Minutes in Heaven" to only read a few pages before boxing the book up, thinking the story was simply fabricated.  However, a similar book, "Heaven is For Real" struck me in a new way.  The difference, I can place the family in context and trust a few different people who say the father telling the story is a credible man.  Personally, I believe this story is very real, as I also believe "Heaven is For Real". 

In short, a little boy's appendix burst and went untreated as the doctors misread his symptoms.  During surgery, the little boy recounts his visit to Heaven.  I was personally convicted a number of times in reading this story, two moments I want to revisit.  First was when Colton tells his parents how he saw them from Heaven while his earthly dad brokenly cried out to the Father and his mother made calls to place her son on the prayer chain, facts that no one witnessed or discussed.  Later in the story Colton tells his dad that he was with the Holy Spirit praying for him because he was so distraught.  God's Word tells us that His Spirit intercedes on our behalf when we do not know what to pray.  I have known this was true for years, but what a vivid reminder that this very day I have the Holy Spirit fighting on my behalf. 

Second, Colton makes reference to Armageddon.  I believe the comment I am remembering is when Colton's father asks if he was scared.  Colton asnwered, "Yes, but Jesus wins."  Colton made a few other comments that so purely exemplefied the faith of a child that Christ speaks about in His Word.  Again, a simple truth I'd already known but so powerful.  As I mentioned before, I have always known God wins and yet I have lived in fear.  I know, "perfect love drives out fear," but I do not live freely.  Something in reading this modern day testiment of Heaven sparked a new fire in me, one that made me excited for the Lord's return.  It was such a beautiful story of what we cannot see and a reminder of what I am to be longing for.  Now, I can truly say,

"And Lord, haste the day when my faith shall be sight,

The clouds be rolled back as a scroll;

The trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend,

Even so, it is well with my soul."